May 6, 2020
Dear Mom,
Reporting to you from Camp Green Lake. I’m here because I saw that this
hamburger that was just laying there in a glass box. I was hungry, so I ate it.
Turned out to be the world’s oldest burger without mold on it. The stomach ache
was worse for me than getting caught. I admit, I did eat it, but why do I have to
go to Camp Greenlake for it? It’s just a burger!
hamburger that was just laying there in a glass box. I was hungry, so I ate it.
Turned out to be the world’s oldest burger without mold on it. The stomach ache
was worse for me than getting caught. I admit, I did eat it, but why do I have to
go to Camp Greenlake for it? It’s just a burger!
Camp is living in a dessert and having no fun, and you’re always in pain.
All we do is dig holes all day and, if you’re slow, all night, too.
And may I remind you, this is in the middle of the dessert. It’s hot. Even in April.
On the 26th of April, my muscles didn’t even work. I couldn’t even walk.
I had to slug out of my bed, if you could call it that, and had to throw my shovel
over my shoulder, and slugged my way to my hole. All the other people here are
not excited also. They were moaning and groaning and all the sounds you think a
human could make. It’s not fun. I heard that my whole 5th grade class is also here
and writing letters. I think they’re pretty okay people, you know. I think my teacher is
up to no good. I think she framed us all so we could experience the book in real life.
She’s a no good, dirty rotten, pig-stealing teacher.
All we do is dig holes all day and, if you’re slow, all night, too.
And may I remind you, this is in the middle of the dessert. It’s hot. Even in April.
On the 26th of April, my muscles didn’t even work. I couldn’t even walk.
I had to slug out of my bed, if you could call it that, and had to throw my shovel
over my shoulder, and slugged my way to my hole. All the other people here are
not excited also. They were moaning and groaning and all the sounds you think a
human could make. It’s not fun. I heard that my whole 5th grade class is also here
and writing letters. I think they’re pretty okay people, you know. I think my teacher is
up to no good. I think she framed us all so we could experience the book in real life.
She’s a no good, dirty rotten, pig-stealing teacher.
My friends at camp are Pinky (Evelyn) and Ms. Thooth (Maria). I think that they’ve
changed a bit since being at camp. Before camp, Evelyn was as hyper as if she had
15 cups of coffee. Now she’s a slug and can’t even get out of bed anymore. Maria,
she’s turned a little bit on the annoying side. If I say anything a little wrong, she will nag
me all day, and never give me any rest. That no good, dirty rotten, pig-stealing teacher
framed us all. Evelyn was just walking down the street when she found this puppy.
It was so cute, you don’t even know how cute it was. So she picked it up and brought
it home. But you know why that puppy was so special? Because the puppy had super
powers and made everybody think it was the cutest puppy of all time. Maria, she found
a coupon that said that she could get so many Robucks for free, and apparently, Robucks
were cursed so she had bad luck forever.
changed a bit since being at camp. Before camp, Evelyn was as hyper as if she had
15 cups of coffee. Now she’s a slug and can’t even get out of bed anymore. Maria,
she’s turned a little bit on the annoying side. If I say anything a little wrong, she will nag
me all day, and never give me any rest. That no good, dirty rotten, pig-stealing teacher
framed us all. Evelyn was just walking down the street when she found this puppy.
It was so cute, you don’t even know how cute it was. So she picked it up and brought
it home. But you know why that puppy was so special? Because the puppy had super
powers and made everybody think it was the cutest puppy of all time. Maria, she found
a coupon that said that she could get so many Robucks for free, and apparently, Robucks
were cursed so she had bad luck forever.
I think I’m a pretty good person, so I won’t exactly escape, but if I was more of the rebel type,
I think I would send a letter to you and ask you to pick up a car and take me away to the
Bahamas or Hawaii or any extravagant location. I think I will have to sadly say that I have
to stay here longer, and go through torture every single second of my life. See you in five
years!
I think I would send a letter to you and ask you to pick up a car and take me away to the
Bahamas or Hawaii or any extravagant location. I think I will have to sadly say that I have
to stay here longer, and go through torture every single second of my life. See you in five
years!
Your child,
Reagan
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